“A person will sometimes devote all his life to the development of one part of his body – the wishbone.”

“The intermediate stage between socialism and capitalism is alcoholism.”

“It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light.”

“An ardent supporter of the hometown team should go to a game prepared to take offense, no matter what happens.”

“The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count our blessings.”

“Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines.”

“Each day is the scholar of yesterday.”

“I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they don’t even invite me.”

“A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.”

“Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time when the quo has lost its status.”