“Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?”

“Democracy consists of choosing your dictators, after they’ve told you what you think it is you want to hear.”

“The time to stop talking is when the other person nods his head affirmatively but says nothing.”

“An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.”

“The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too.”

“‘Who are you and how did you get in here?’ ‘I’m a locksmith. And, I’m a locksmith.'”

“It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers.”

“I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.”

“The universal brotherhood of man is our most precious possession, what there is of it.”

“A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.”